Reflections on 2024

Wisdom is all around us: from the MBT Blog
Published by Mary Balistreri, MBT More Business Today LLC

As 2024 closes, most of us are busily preparing for end-of-the-year parties and gatherings, spending real time with our communities of people who know us, and possibly trying to meet a few new connections to add to our network for next year. Maybe reflection will happen on January 2, 2025.

Recently, I was fortunate to stay in a resort in Colorado for a few days as I worked with a new client to kickoff our training and coaching initiative. Just like the woman in the photo, I spent a few hours gazing at the mountains (we don’t have them here in Wisconsin). Calm and serenity washed over me freeing my mind for reflection. My hope for all of you who read this blog is you pause, find a cozy or reflective spot, and give your mind the freedom of thought.

As The Mindful Business Coach, I pause today to relay to all my readers the reflections gathered from my own experiences, wisdom shared with me by clients and communities in 2024, and, of course, the lessons learned by the stars of this year’s blog posts, David and Norah.

Who You Work With Is As Important As What Your Work Is

Both David and Norah realized in 2024 the truth of this statement. For them, work needs to be fulfilling, but of equal importance to them is the community at work and sharing values in the workplace. Once Norah became Director of Diversity for her company and began working directly with the CEO, she felt empowered to create an inclusive environment and felt good about her job and the environment it offered. For David, however, the more success he gained in his law firm, the more apparent it became that opportunities were not shared equally among those working so hard to succeed. He questioned his environment even as he realized he was one of the chosen to receive opportunities. He still contemplates leaving the firm and opening his own firm focused on inclusivity.

To Speak Up or Not to Speak Up

David struggled with the guilt and unfairness of receiving multiple chances to move up in his organization while the women and minority colleagues did not. David decided to speak up and was surprised by the reaction. It reminded him of bullies in middle school. The administration knew about the issues but expected the kids to work it out among them. Basically, nothing happened to stem the bullying from a systemic level. It was up to the kids to stand up for each other or ignore those receiving the bullying. “Nothing changes,” David thought. “It’s still up to me to speak up and hope that someone will speak up for me when I am on the receiving end of unfair treatment in the future.”

Words carry baggage; they are rarely neutral.

Here is the rest of the quote from Judith E Glaser, author of Conversational Intelligence: How Great Leaders Build Trust and Get Extraordinary Results . “Words carry a history of years of use. Each time another experience overlays another meaning, and it all gets collected somewhere in our brain – ‘the vault’ – it’s there, ready to be activated during a conversation.”

Throughout the blog posts this year, our heroes, David and Norah, struggled with, prepared for, soul searched, and practiced conversations. They understood the concept from Conversational Intelligence “Words Create Worlds.” Culture exists on multiple levels and words carry meaning based on culture – from work experience, from work environments, from upbringing, and from personal experience. Remaining curious and self-aware to notice the impact of words and to ask for clarification led them both to higher levels of conversation and understanding throughout the year.

Prepare for A Conversation: Gently, Truthfully

Both Norah and David looked to their mentors for advice on how to approach a much-needed, volatile conversation with their father. As Edgar, David’s boss and mentor cautioned, “Know what you are aiming for.” Norah’s mentor, Sherri, gave similar advice. Before embarking on a difficult conversation, know what outcome you want to achieve. The acknowledgement of the goal creates the tone of the conversation. For Norah and David, the goal was to forge a stronger relationship with their dad and, ultimately, create a happier family life. They adopted the mantra gentle truth as a constant reminder to approach their dad with love, patience and curiosity. Their hard work paid off and the group has plans for a family Christmas and Kwanzaa!

“It is so easy to give advice to others, and so difficult to take your own advice.” Mary Balistreri, The Mindful Business Coach

Ever have that experience when you do not know how to proceed with a challenge and a friend or colleague spouts advice that basically came directly from you? That phenomenon, “Physician heal thyself,” reminds us how each of us needs support. Community heals and lights the way. Sometimes we are the sage, and sometimes we need the sage.

Breathe.

Finally, slow down and take a breath. Did you notice you stopped breathing during an anxiety-instilling situation? Or, maybe your breathing had become shallow but you did not notice. Take a moment. Schedule time on your calendar to stop and breathe. In through your nose, out through your mouth. Relax your shoulders. Where do you feel the effects of 2024? Massage that area gently. Acknowledge the positive and negative of the year. Then let it go.